About Allison Bottke

The author of the Setting Boundaries book series from Harvest House Publishers.

Make Your Writing Dream a Reality


Want to make your writing dream a reality?

Join me and an amazing faculty of professionals at the beautiful Lake Yale Conference Center in Leesburg, Florida for the annual Florida Christian Writers Conference from February 25 thru March 1, 2015. Visit the website now for more information, and make sure to check out the Faculty Blog for timely tips and updates on workshops, keynotes, continuing education classes, and more.


NEW Revised Companion Study Guide Material

What began as one book has grown into the acclaimed Setting Boundaries series.

Setting Boundaries with Adult Children

SANITY Support

Companion Study Guide



Sanity Support Cover


Workbook & Leader Guide

Now Combined!

12-week program developed

for small groups

but also applicable for Individuals and Couples

Click on image above for SANITY Support product information.


Talkin’ About the Stress of Being a Teen Girl – Join Me Today LIVE on The Debbie Chavez Show at 11:05 AM (CST)

Debbie Chavez Logo


It’s that time again! In August of 2013 Debbie and I talked about the challenges women have in setting healthy boundaries and listener response to that program was off the chain. In Auguist of 2012 our discussion on setting boundariers with food also brought a flood of listener phone calls.


Today we are going to cut right to the chase and discuss the serious issues teen girls are facing today and we’d love to have you join us as we talk about A Young Woman’s Guide to Setting Boundaries – Six Steps to Help Teens Make Smart Choices, Cope with Stress and Untangle Mixed-up Emotions.


The program is streaming live online and if you miss it a podcast will be available in the next few days.

Join us today, Monday, August 25 at 11:05 (CST) streaming live from Faithplace.org on The Debbie Chavez Show.


The Debbie Chavez Show is carried Monday through Friday at the internet radio station. Debbie Chavez is a faith-based, internet talk radio host as well as a dynamic and transparent women’s conference speaker. Debbie Chavez is a pastor’s wife who interviews expert guests for Biblical wisdom and answers listener questions.
Faithplace.org consists of shows produced and distributed by the 501(c)3 non-profit organization Great Awakening Productions. Their mission is to fill the spiritual void in conventional talk radio with biblically-based perspectives that are presented by hosts who are not only dynamic, transparent, and frank…but have years of accumulated wisdom and experience in their fields. They desire to point listeners toward a deeper relationship with the God of the Bible. Currently, they have listeners in all 50 states and over 95 countries.


What is Your Agenda, God?

Solutions Not Problems Notice On Board

I’m having a tough time trying to figure out God’s plan for my life.

I’m overwhelmed by the obstacles and I don’t know which way to turn.

How like God to send me a message via the Harvest House Weekly Devotional.


Monday, August 18, 2014

When I Need to Make a Fresh Start

This devotional by Lloyd John Ogilvie from the book: Praying Through the Tough Times is just what I needed to read today.


How about you?


Allison talks Setting Boundaries Live with Neil Boron and Kerby Anderson

Lifeline Radio









Please join me LIVE ON AIR TODAY and TOMORROW (Tuesday 8/12 and Wednesday 8/13) when I’ll be visiting with …

Please join me LIVE TODAY and TOMORROW (Tuesday 8/12 and Wednesday 8/13) when I’ll be visiting LIVE ON-AIR with two of the most well-respected and professional program hosts working in Christian talk radio today as we discuss “A Young Woman’s Guide to Setting Boundaries – Six Steps to Help Teens Make Smart Choices, Cope with Stress, and Untangle Mixed-up Emotions.”

You can listen LIVE via online streaming or check back later and listen to the ARCHIVE interviews that will be available within 24-hours on their respective websites. Program links appear below.

A new book in the Setting Boundaries series from Harvest House Publishers has just released this month and it’s becoming clear that we’ve hit on a hot button topic.

“The teen years for young girls can be overwhelming and challenging as they navigate their ability to make the right decisions, and manage their choices concerning parents, friendships, school, sexuality, and faith. Understanding boundaries will equip teen girls to get a better handle on the stress that comes from dealing with people and circumstances that push their boundaries, expand their boundaries, or fight against their boundaries.”

If you have a teen girl, know a teen girl, or are a teen girl, you’ll want to tune in and share these program links.

“Strong physical and psychological boundaries protect us from harm, and from having a negative impact on who we are destined to be. We are not meant to live in pain, depression, and stress that come with a life without boundaries,” says Bottke. “Healthy boundaries can provide us with the faith and courage to stand up and do what is right in tough situations and circumstances.”

Tuesday, August 12 – STREAMING LIVE from 3:00 – 5:00 (CST)
WDCX Radio Broadcasting “Lifeline” hosted by Neil Boron
Special two-hour program
Listen live online: http://www.wdcxradio.com/pages/14462696.php


Wednesday, August 13 – STREAMING LIVE from 1:00 – 2:00 (CST)
IRN/USA Radio Network “Point of View ” hosted by Kerby Anderson
Listen locally: KBXD AM 1480
Listen live online: www.pointofview.net


Again, you can listen LIVE via online streaming or check back later and listen to the ARCHIVE interviews that will be available within 24-hours on their respective websites

Is There a Teen Girl in Your Life?

Book Six in the Award Winning Bestselling Series by Allison Bottke from Harvest House Publishers

Book Six in the Award Winning Bestselling Series by Allison Bottke from Harvest House Publishers

Share a life-changing truth with the special teen girls in your life…a powerful truth that almost 200,000 adult readers have come to learn.

It may be difficult for some adults to believe, but today’s young women are faced with unimaginable pressure, expectations and stress. Now more than ever our precious daughters, granddaughters, nieces, neighbors and friends need to know the truth about setting healthy boundaries. They need the life-changing knowledge that it is possible for them to set boundaries in a stress-filled out-of-control life! And we need to provide them with the tools they need to make smart choices, cope with stress, and untangle their mixed-up emotions. Please join me in sharing this important and timely resource with the special teen girls in your life. Together we can encourage and empower young women around the world to jump off the crazy gerbil wheel of insanity and find SANITY!

PRE-ORDER your books today for the special young women in your life.

And encourage them to visit our new SANITY Support Facebook page for teen girls, where they can take part in a growing community of young women who are learning about the incredible freedom in setting healthy boundaries! They can also learn more about an exciting ESSAY CONTEST we’re launching to give readers an opportunity to share their boundary stories and win prizes!

Setting Boundaries with SANITY Support – March 2014 Newsletter

SS01_ABMarch 2014 Newsletter

Six Tips to Survive Challenging Seasons in Life


(NOTE: This newsletter was delivered to subscribers on Sunday, March 16, 2014.)


As a subscriber to the SANITY Support Newsletter, you’ve most likely read one or more of the five books in the Setting Boundaries ® series. And as a subscriber, I promised to send you regular updates on new books in the series, and provide you with SANITY Support Tips, helpful tools, and valuable resources to live hopeful lives. I promised to blog often and offer free downloadable information on my website to help you find (and keep) sanity in your challenging relationships. However, I have not been very good at consistently doing these things.


But that is about to change, starting with this communication, and I hope you’ll hang in and give me another chance.


I’m deeply humbled by the growing number of subscribers to the SANITY Support Newsletter. Clearly, I’m not alone in my desire to find freedom from living on the gerbil-wheel of insanity that often accompanies life when we have weak or non-existent boundaries. I greatly appreciate the questions, comments, and thank-you notes I receive every day from around the world. Your heartfelt support and encouragement have been such a blessing. Especially during the past few years as the enemy has tried so fervently to stop me from following the call the Lord has placed on my heart.


You see; Satan doesn’t want any of us to be free from the bondage of unhealthy boundaries. He doesn’t want any of us to read books that bring us closer to God—especially the Bible. And he certainly doesn’t want me to write books that promote the need to put God at the center of our lives in order to set healthy boundaries, find peace, and walk in sanity. The fact is, the enemy wants to use every bad choice, negative habit and challenging relationship we have to keep us from having a relationship with the One who matters most—Jesus.

  [Read more…]

Setting Boundaries with Our Time – Relax!

I’m thinking this pretty much says it all.



The Boundaries We Push Against

Little Girl Allison

God has a far bigger plan for our life than we could ever imagine.

Trust Him.


For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Jeremiah 29:11

Tough Love Setting Boundary Advice to a Struggling Mom

6363980-stopA reader sent me the following plea for help. My response might not have been what she expected.
Dear Allison:
I am struggling with issues dealing with my mom and son. My son moved out when he was a teen, he didn’t want to follow the rules at home and was physically abusive to me. He went to live with my mom…he has never been able to do anything wrong in her eyes….she has expected me to be financially responsible but not have a say in anything. His behavior has not changed in the 6 years since he has moved…if I am not helping him, I am a (insert any derogatory expletive here) you name it…he swears at me and tells me I am a horrible parent. My mother and I constantly argue over this, and it has gotten worse. She has him lie to me, evens swears at me in front of him….she totally enables him and deems me the bad parent stating that I abandoned him. I am at a loss here. I am in my 40’s, I don’t drink or do drugs yet I am treated as a horrible person for wanting what is best for my son. I am heartbroken that she really feels like I have treated him poorly and that he thinks I am horrible….I hope you can help me somehow…..I only have my 2 girls.
Dear Reader:
My heart aches for you. However, while the feelings and emotions of your mother and son are important and valid to them … they do NOT constitute your feelings and emotions … and it is critical for you to differentiate the two….and NOT belittle or deny your reality….which is quite different from theirs. Dysfunctional people (and relationships) need to hang on to dysfunctional responses and habits. You must break that habit. You must STOP.
You need to STOP and look at the big picture.
No matter what your son or mother says/does … you are in control of your thoughts and responses. And the fact is, if you are setting HEALTHY boundaries you will not be in agreement with them. Period. Deal with this. Is it important for you to be in agreement with them? Or, to do what is right? Ask God to give you the strength and wisdom you need to be the person He wants you to be.
You have two girls … cherish and love them and show them what love and forgiveness (and not enabling) looks like.
Stand strong and believe in yourself and in what God is doing in your life.
Stop beating yourself up. Get off the gerbil wheel of insanity and find SANITY in this situation.
~ Allison