Join me on Dr. James Dobson’s Family Talk Radio to discuss Setting Boundaries with Food on Tues., Aug. 13


Has food become more than fuel for your body? Has it become your friend, comforter, and ally in times of stress? Join me on Dr. James Dobson’s Family Talk radio this Tuesday, August 13, where we’ll be talking about Setting Boundaries with Food, the 2013 Selah Book-of-the-Year. For local stations, or to stream online or access the archive, visit the Family Talk website by clicking on the graphic above.

Setting Boundaries with Food


Reorganizing Our Relationships

Setting Boundaries with FoodCould it be that excess weight is only a symptom, the result of our soul’s internal struggle to relinquish control, find love, and experience peace?

My heart stuck in my throat as I looked down at my medical chart. Tears stung my eyes as I tried to comprehend what the doctor had written before excusing himself to take an emergency phone call, leaving my opened chart on the desk.

Morbidly obese? How dare he!  My initial anger gave way to a deep, incomprehensible pain as the truth of his words sunk in. Yes, sometimes truth is painful.

Sitting in my car sobbing, I prayed to God for this dance of dysfunction to end.

We’ve got to change the way we think about dieting and break the destructive habit before it breaks us. What we need is a way to find balance and sanity that will bring long-term peace and hope to our lives—not just short term weight loss to our bodies. What we need is the strength and determination to stand up and say, “I’m tired of focusing on food and on my weight—this insanity has to stop—enough is enough!”

For life is more than food, and your body more than clothing (Luke 12:23).

Dieting and setting boundaries with food are two entirely different things. While a focus on the first may or may not yield weight loss, I can almost assure you that a concerted effort to address the second will. Returning food to its rightful place in life can yield amazing results on any number of issues, not the least being our weight.

Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself, for God bought you with a high price. So you must honor God with your body (1 Corinthians 6:19-20).

Oswald Chambers said, “Christianity is not walking in the light of our convictions but walking in the light of the Lord, a very different thing. Convictions are necessary, but only as stepping stones to all that God wants us to be.” [1]

God wants us to be more than what we eat—or weigh.


Adapted from Setting Boundaries with Food, Six Steps to Lose Weight, Gain Freedom, and Take Back Your Life by Allison Bottke © 2008. Harvest House Publishers. All rights reserved.

Visit the Setting Boundaries Books website today for more information. 

[1] The Quotable Oswald Chambers, Compiled and Edited by David McCasland (Grand Rapids, MI: Discovery House Publishers, 2008), 59.


New Material NOW AVAILABLE for Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children

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New Material NOW AVAILABLE for Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children

I know many of you can relate to walking in the valleys of trial, tribulation, and testing this past year. I know it’s been a hard year for many of us as I read your e-mail, and pray with and for you as you struggle to set healthy boundaries and find SANITY in sometimes out-of-control insane situations.

As you prepare for the new year it is my prayer for you to know and believe that SANITY is possible! I’m excited to share that resources are now available for you to gather a small group of people, like you, who have challenging relationships with adult children. People just like you who are ready to stop the insanity and start the journey to SANITY in the new year. Don’t wait for another year to go by.

The 6-Steps to SANITY and 12-weeks to Freedom program will help you learn if you are an enabler in your adult child’s life—and if so—how to stop; what steps to SANITY you can take; how to yield it all to God and how to develop an action plan allowing God to make a way where there seems to be no way. This 12-week curriculum is now available in a vibrant full-color, spiral bound Study Guide, designed as a companion to the best selling book: Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children, Six Steps to Hope and Healing for Struggling Parents. Used in conjunction with the book, the SANITY Support Study Guide can be followed in any number of settings, including home, church, and business environments.

**PLUS** We now have a separate Leader Guide that contains step-by-step information to plan, organize and facilitate the 6-Steps to SANITY and 12-weeks to Freedom program in your local community or church, even if you’ve never led a group before. Group facilitators will also need a copy of the Study Guide and book, as the Leader Guide is intended as a companion to the 12-week program.

Visit our website storefront for more information on acquiring these life-changing resources. Tell a friend in need, help change a life.

The 6-Steps to SANITY Prescription!

Set Boundaries and Lose Weight with SANITY Support!

Guest VIP Blogger,

Bev Eden

Setting Boundaries with Food, WLS News and SANITY Support

Welcome to the brand new SANITY Support blog! As someone who has lost 120 pounds (and kept it off for ten years) I’m especially excited about Weight Watching Wednesday! I’m even more excited that I get to introduce you to a very special woman.

At 50-years-young, Beverly Eden has lots going on in her life, but there are three things she keeps prioritized at the top of her list. First and foremost is her relationship with God. She is a Christian who loves the Lord with all her might. Secondly, she is married to the love of her life, Paddy. Thirdly, she is a mother of five and grandmother of 10 and counting! Beverly has been working for the same school district as an office manager/secretary for 27 years. She has struggled with her weight all of her adult life. In fact, she has lost and found the same 100 pounds (or more) three different times before deciding to have weight loss surgery. In January of 2010, Bev had Roux-en-Y gastric bypass surgery, and to date, she has lost 150 pounds. Beverly is passionate about exercising for the first time in her life and watching her diet, and she wants to share her journey and encourage you to share yours.

Bev will be hosting Weight Watching Wednesday here on the SANITY Support blog, responding to your comments and posting relevant topics weekly. Way to go, Bev! (Can we get a collective yahoo?!) Make sure to subscribe to the RSS feed for this blog so you can read her Wednesday posts.)

Without further ado…may I introduce you to the wonderful, fun, fabulous, and FIT, Beverly Eden!


Greetings to all on the first official posting on SANITY Support’s Weight Watching Wednesday!

I have always believed that everything happens for a reason. I know that sounds like just another cliché’, but it’s one about which I feel very passionately. I also believe that God allows us to go through trials in our lives to not only mold and teach us, but for us to be able to help one another.

Many people think of support as something you get. It is also something that you give. I have never had cancer and I pray that I never will. I can sympathize with people who are going through it, but I don’t know exactly how they feel. I do; however; know what it is like to struggle with weight problems and all of the issues that go with it. Having lost 150 pounds after weight loss surgery (WLS), I can offer support to people who struggle with those same issues.

Allison Bottke Plus Size Model Levi

Allison has also had weight loss surgery; she’s lost 120 pounds (check out her before and after photos! And, did any of you know Allison was one of the first plus-size models with the Wilhelmina Agency in the early 80‘s? I remember seeing her Levi Strauss ad and the Pendleton Knitwear ad as well!)

But it’s important to know that here on the SANITY Support blog, Weight Watching Wednesday is NOT only for those who have had or are considering WLS. Please join our blogging community if you want to find SANITY in the insane situations that often characterize the lives of people who struggle with any kind of weight-related issues, not just WLS issues. We’ll discuss yo-yo dieting, the fast food habit, emotional eating, fad diets, and a host of issues.

In Allison’s Setting Boundaries book series, the Six-Step SANITY acronym is a key component. The “A“ stands for, ASSEMBLE a Support Group. Studies show that next to journaling, a strong support group is the key to achieving and maintaining sustained weight loss. One way that I choose to give back to the WLS community is by blogging here and talking to everyone I meet about the benefits of losing weight.  Another way I both give and receive help is by being a part of support groups. Having others who totally understand what I am going through makes my journey so much easier! I believe that reading and discussing good books pertaining to my life’s situations are also wonderful ways of coping.

The newest book in Allison’s popular series from Harvest House Publishing is Setting Boundaries with Difficult People, and there’s no doubt in my mind that many of us who struggle with weight-related issues have more than a few difficult people in our lives (including ourselves at times!) I’d love to start a discussion group here about this new book.

(Although it’s not mandatory that you read the newest Setting Boundaries book to participate in our online community, I’d like to encourage you to pick up a copy, it could change your life!)

Hope, healing, and freedom is possible when we follow the Six-Steps to SANITY in our everyday journey through life! Let’s take that journey together here, what do you say?

Allison is just completing the fourth book in the Setting Boundaries series and I can’t wait to get my hands on it! Setting Boundaries with Food will release next year (2012) but I’ve got exciting news to share…here on Weight Watching Wednesday we’ll be getting sneak peeks at the manuscript over the next several months! Plus, we’ll be able to participate in some pre-publishing aspects AND get early access to the book before the public.

But that’s not all…we’re going to have opportunities to win free copies of Setting Boundaries with Food AND copies of the first three books in the series; Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children, Setting Boundaries with Aging Parents and Setting Boundaries with Difficult People, as well as copies of Allison’s contemporary fiction for Boomer Babes!

AND….DRUM ROLL PLEASE… for those who live in the DFW area (or wish to travel here) Allison will be hosting a special invitation-only book release party next year SPECIFICALLY FOR THE WEIGHT WATCHING WEDNESDAY COMMUNITY! We’re going to have a blast and you won’t want to miss it. (I’ve already told Allison she’s going to need a really big room to hold all of us because we’re going to have a whole lot of folks communicating in our community!)

And that’s not all…throughout the year we’ll be announcing other times when we can all get together for last-minute impromptu lunches, afternoon tea parties, or day-trip excursions with Allison. We’re going to rock this Wednesday party!

All that said, I’m excited and blessed to have the opportunity to be the official Weight Watching Wednesday Blog Hostess on the new SANITY Support blog! (Hey Allison, do I get a tiara?)

Between you and me folks, what do you say we show the other day-of-the-week blog hosts what it means to build an online community and get the comments started!

If you’ve read any of Allison’s books, please share your thoughts and feelings on the Six-Steps to SANITY. Perhaps you could visit some of the pages on the new website, read other posts on the SANITY Support blog, and maybe watch a few of the You Tube video clips posted and share your thought.

What are some of the ways that you have found hope and healing by applying the “A” step in your life? Would you be willing to open up to others to share your experiences? And last but not least, do your relationships with difficult people affect your relationship with food? Let’s discuss relationships in general, the first chapters in Setting Boundaries with Difficult People, and how this can apply to our struggles with food and weight. Please let me know your thoughts.

Oh! There’s one more thing I want to quickly mention before I sign off. There’s an amazing online resource for anyone who has had WLS or is considering WLS, it’s called With an online community of thousands, this website has more information than you can shake a stick at, including a glossy hard cover magazine.

I encourage you to check out this informative website, including the two featured cover stories Obesity Help Magazine has done on Allison over the past decade.

Until the comments start flowing and we get to chatting…God bless!