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A = ASSEMBLE a Support Group

December 21, 2012 By 1 Comment

SANITY Support - Allison Bottke

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Many parents in pain have grown accustomed to maintaining a kind of “silent shame” concerning sharing the circumstances and issues surrounding our adult children. Attending or assembling a support group is the last thing we want to do.

Yet it’s one of the first things we must do to gain strength in a season of life that will most certainly require every ounce of fortitude we can muster. At times when our strength runs low, we must have others willing to intervene on our behalf and hold us up. We must begin looking at our circumstances objectively, emotionally distancing ourselves from our situations in order to gain a healthy perspective.

Making clear intentional choices based on facts and not on feelings will be critical as we move ahead. The best way to do this is through prayer and group support.

“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work:  If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken”.  Ecclesiastes 4:9-12

Find out more about starting or attending a SANITY Support Group in your community by visiting our website.

Filed Under: Adult Children, Blog, Co-Dependency, Enabling, Hope and SANITY from Allison, Hope/Healing, The Blessing of Boundaries, Wisdom & Resources Tagged With: , , , , , , ,

Finding SANITY in the Season

December 19, 2012 By Leave a Comment

Share your Sanity Story - Allison Bottke

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Seven Days Until Christmas

It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas … the time of year when all the family members gather, those we can’t wait to see…and others we wish we didn’t have to see. There, I said it. You know the ones I mean…the family members that seem to carry their drama, chaos and crisis into every situation. The folks whose choices bring a black cloud over every gathering, often turning festive occasions into frustrating nightmares. Let’s face it folks, some of our family relationships (and members) are a tad dysfunctional.

 

If you can relate, take heart! SANITY is possible,

and it’s going to be my gift to you this week before Christmas.

As the author of the Setting Boundaries ® book series from Harvest House Publishers, some people think I’m an expert at setting and keeping healthy boundaries. However, that’s not entirely accurate. The truth is, I’m often faced with situations and circumstances where my boundary setting ability is tested beyond belief. Times when I find myself repeating the Six-Steps over and over in my mind as I make choices in how to respond to a person who is pushing my buttons.

During this season of peace and goodwill toward others, let’s remember that it is possible to be loving and firm at the same time. This season, instead of letting those difficult people get under your skin, make a vow to respond in an entirely different manner. Confound them with your new communication skills.

My prayer for you this season and throughout the New Year is that by using the principles of SANITY, your life will change…and just maybe the lives of others in your sphere will change, too.

Join me tomorrow for the first step on your journey to live the kind of life God intended you to live, a life of love, joy, peace and prosperity.

Allison's Signature Scriptina Font

Filed Under: Adult Children, Blog, Difficult People, Hope and SANITY from Allison, The Blessing of Boundaries, Wisdom & Resources Tagged With: , , , , ,

New Material NOW AVAILABLE for Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children

December 11, 2012 By 7 Comments
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New Material NOW AVAILABLE for Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children

I know many of you can relate to walking in the valleys of trial, tribulation, and testing this past year. I know it’s been a hard year for many of us as I read your e-mail, and pray with and for you as you struggle to set healthy boundaries and find SANITY in sometimes out-of-control insane situations.

As you prepare for the new year it is my prayer for you to know and believe that SANITY is possible! I’m excited to share that resources are now available for you to gather a small group of people, like you, who have challenging relationships with adult children. People just like you who are ready to stop the insanity and start the journey to SANITY in the new year. Don’t wait for another year to go by.

The 6-Steps to SANITY and 12-weeks to Freedom program will help you learn if you are an enabler in your adult child’s life—and if so—how to stop; what steps to SANITY you can take; how to yield it all to God and how to develop an action plan allowing God to make a way where there seems to be no way. This 12-week curriculum is now available in a vibrant full-color, spiral bound Study Guide, designed as a companion to the best selling book: Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children, Six Steps to Hope and Healing for Struggling Parents. Used in conjunction with the book, the SANITY Support Study Guide can be followed in any number of settings, including home, church, and business environments.

**PLUS** We now have a separate Leader Guide that contains step-by-step information to plan, organize and facilitate the 6-Steps to SANITY and 12-weeks to Freedom program in your local community or church, even if you’ve never led a group before. Group facilitators will also need a copy of the Study Guide and book, as the Leader Guide is intended as a companion to the 12-week program.

Visit our website storefront for more information on acquiring these life-changing resources. Tell a friend in need, help change a life.

The 6-Steps to SANITY Prescription!

Filed Under: Adult Children, Aging Parents, Blog, Co-Dependency, Difficult People, Enabling, Fiction, Food/Weight, Hope and SANITY from Allison, Hope/Healing, SANITY Stories, Slider, The Blessing of Boundaries, Uncategorized, VIP Guest Blogs, When Enough is Enough, Wisdom & Resources, WLS Tagged With: , , , , , , , , ,

Buffering Your Suffering with Boundaries Around Your Heart

August 9, 2012 By 8 Comments

I felt like one of those aluminum Christmas trees folks had when I was a kid, the kind with the rotating color wheel that sat on the floor underneath it, projecting an array of colors on the tree’s metallic branches. It was quite a spectacle to see the tree change before your very eyes, going from red to blue to green, sometimes the tree itself was on a rotating stand, further enhancing the experience.

 

If emotions were colors, I reflected all of them sitting in the booth at Applebee’s this past Tuesday, during that lull in time before the dinner crowd arrives. I was feeling angry, fearful, resentful, and insecure, but mostly I was feeling an incomprehensible sense of confusion and pain. “What more does God want from me?” I cried.

 

This was supposed to be a day of closure and rebirth. A day when legal decisions would be made that would allow me to bury the remnants of poor choices, past mistakes, and painful experiences and begin living once again. This was supposed to be a day of resolution and relief—or so I had hoped and prayed. After years of being consumed with loss, grief and increasing feelings of fear and desperation, years when my physical health suffered, my financial health suffered, and yes, I’m sorry to say times when my spiritual health suffered, I had allowed myself to believe that this would be the day when this long season would at last come to an end.

 

“When does it stop?” The tears flowed. “What am I supposed to learn that I’m not learning? I don’t think I can take this suffering anymore. Maybe I’m not supposed to be a writer, maybe it’s time to throw in the towel, maybe that’s what I’m doing wrong. Maybe it’s not God’s plan or purpose for me to write about setting healthy boundaries, maybe I’ve got it all wrong…everything shouldn’t be this hard.” Clearly, I was not coping very well, and I certainly wasn’t filtering my challenging circumstances through the lens of the 6-Steps to SANITY…I wasn’t walking my talk.

 

My friend and moral support listened patiently; I could tell her heart was aching for me as she watched my hit-the-wall melt-down. Not quite sure what to do about the emotional lady in the booth by the window, our server brought extra mozzarella cheese sticks and maintained a wide berth.

 

“You’ve got to claim victory, Allison!” My friend said. “You’ve got to continue praising God through this. No matter what.”

 

It’s the “no matter what” seasons that get us, isn’t it?

 

I went home Tuesday night and cried myself to sleep. Wednesday morning my eyes were like two slits in a puff pastry face. I read my Bible, the Streams in the Desert devotional for the day, and Our Daily Bread. I wrote in my OnCall Prayer Journal, and I prayed and prayed some more. I spent the day talking to God. Like many of us, I’m no stranger to intense trial and tribulation. However, I’ve seen God’s amazing grace, mercy and love in so many miraculous situations and circumstances—I never doubt His presence.

 

Yet it suddenly dawned on me that’s exactly what I was doing in Applebee’s on Tuesday as I whined, cried, and babbled about my situation and circumstances. How pathetic—how unproductive—how human. Things didn’t go as I had hoped they would, but who am I to place a statute of limitations on trial and tribulation? God has a plan, and I’m not God (a fact He frequently has to remind me of.)

 

Life really is all about setting healthy boundaries, every day in every way. Not just with our adult children, difficult people, or even with food or time. Sometimes we need to set a healthy boundary around our heart that keeps out our own negative thoughts, feelings and fears. Proverbs 5:23 teaches us, “Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.” I can’t control all the drama, chaos, crisis, or circumstances of life, but I can control how I respond to them.

 

And so I dusted myself off and began thanking and praising God.

 

I thanked Him for the people, places, things, circumstances, and situations that molded together are making me the person He wants me to be. I thanked Him for the gift of His son. I thanked Him for the wisdom of His Word. I thanked Him in advance for giving me the strength to continue enduring this season and for the wisdom and discernment to understand His plan and purpose for my life.

 

And I began claiming victory!

 

Trusting God is a choice we make, and I’ve chosen to trust Him. I’ve chosen to be “All In” with God, and that means even during the times when I may feel left out.

 

Faith and Endurance – James 1:1-26 (NLT)

2 Dear brothers and sisters,[a] when troubles come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. 3 For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. 4 So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.

 

5 If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking. 6 But when you ask him, be sure that your faith is in God alone. Do not waver, for a person with divided loyalty is as unsettled as a wave of the sea that is blown and tossed by the wind.7 Such people should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. 8 Their loyalty is divided between God and the world, and they are unstable in everything they do.

 

9 Believers who are[b] poor have something to boast about, for God has honored them. 10 And those who are rich should boast that God has humbled them. They will fade away like a little flower in the field. 11 The hot sun rises and the grass withers; the little flower droops and falls, and its beauty fades away. In the same way, the rich will fade away with all of their achievements.

 

12 God blesses those who patiently endure testing and temptation. Afterward they will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him. 13 And remember, when you are being tempted, do not say, “God is tempting me.” God is never tempted to do wrong,[c] and he never tempts anyone else. 14 Temptation comes from our own desires, which entice us and drag us away. 15 These desires give birth to sinful actions. And when sin is allowed to grow, it gives birth to death.

 

16 So don’t be misled, my dear brothers and sisters. 17 Whatever is good and perfect comes down to us from God our Father, who created all the lights in the heavens.[d] He never changes or casts a shifting shadow.[e] 18 He chose to give birth to us by giving us his true word. And we, out of all creation, became his prized possession.[f]

 

Filed Under: Adult Children, Blog, Difficult People, Hope and SANITY from Allison, Hope/Healing, The Blessing of Boundaries, When Enough is Enough Tagged With: , , , , , , ,

Nothing is Impossible with God

July 15, 2012 By Leave a Comment

I’m blessed to attend a church where the Word of God (aka: The Bible) is the primary component of every sermon message. Every week, Pastor Chuck Angel (yes, our church has an Angel in the pulpit) imparts a powerful message based on Scriptural truth, citing numerous chapters and verses as we follow along in our Bibles.

 

This summer we are learning how to DREAM BIG AND PRAY HARD as we participate in Pray 60 – 60 Days to Dream Big and Pray Hard.

 

The message today began with Matthew 9:18. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard the story in Matthew 9:20 about the woman “who had been subject to bleeding for twelve years.” As Jesus passed by her in a crowd, she reached out “and touched the edge of His cloak—and by her faith she was instantly healed.

 

Today, God laid something new on my heart as I sat in church reading that Scripture. For many mothers who have challenging relationships with equally challenging adult children, our hearts have been bleeding for years, and we are desperate for the pain to stop. We pray, cry, plead, and bargain—yet nothing changes. The ongoing drama, chaos and crisis surrounding the lives of our adult children, is sapping us of our lifeblood.

 

Many of us don’t even know any more how—or what—to pray. If you’re searching for an answer in how to help your adult child through another crisis, the answer is closer than you might think.

 

We need to reach out and touch Jesus—believing without question that He can heal our broken and bleeding hearts. That He can give us the wisdom and discernment to make choices that will stop the insanity. That He can make a difference in our lives—and in the lives of our adult children. For nothing is impossible with God.

 

Pastor Chuck says, “Bold prayers honor God, and God honors bold prayers.”

 

If you have a difficult relationship with a challenging person, whether it’s an adult child, spouse, sibling, parent, or employer, join me today in praying boldly for the bleeding to stop. Believe without question that God will make a way when there seems to be no way—and finding that way begins when our relationship with Jesus Christ becomes the most important relationship in our lives. When we understand that reaching out and touching Him is the only thing that can save us.

 

The “Pray 60” sermon series is changing my life and the lives of many in my church family here in Fort Worth, Texas. God is moving in miraculous ways as Pastor Chuck and Jill Angel follow the calling God has placed on their lives, faithfully ministering to others with love, grace, knowledge, and wisdom. I’d like to invite you to listen to the entire “Pray 60″ series online. Or by visiting The Harvest Church website and clicking on the word MEDIA in the upper right corner.

God bless and keep you on your journey to set healthy boundaries and find SANITY.

 

Allison

Filed Under: Adult Children, Blog, Hope and SANITY from Allison, Hope/Healing, Uncategorized, Wisdom & Resources Tagged With: , , , , , ,

Can Something Good Come from an Adult Child’s Drug Addiction?

January 28, 2012 By 13 Comments

The Blessings of Boundaries

My husband and I were in a 12-week SANITY Support group, and it made quite a difference in our lives. At the first meeting I started to have a glimmer of hope, first time in years of watching and enabling my son as he continued to struggle with addiction and bad behavior. Not always easy or steady, though. At about the 5th meeting, things in our home got quite a bit worse…

But we leaned on others in the group as they shared stories that were so similar to ours. Evidently there are a lot of us sharing this agony, and it breaks it down as we share each others’ burdens and lift each other up in prayer.

A huge blessing in this, also, was that my husband has now been in a real church, something I had never thought would happen… Such evidence of God’s love and grace… to take something as awful as a child’s addiction and use it for some good!

Thank you for hosting this at the church, giving us a place to learn about the program and to support each other. – D.

Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children and finding SANITY Support

 

A Note from Allison

The 12-week SANITY Support Group program is being revised to an 8-week program. Please contact me if you would like to host an 8-week program in your home or church.

My son turned 40 this past year and is drug-free and living in his own apartment. Is everything always hunky-dory and peachy-keen? Hardly. Has the journey to setting boundaries suddenly become this smooth ride to joy, hope, and peace?

I wish.

But I will tell you this…without applying the Six Steps to SANITY each and every day I would not have made it this far.

The cry of my heart is to help every parent or grandparent who feels the anguish of watching someone they love self-destruct with drugs or alcohol….

Filed Under: Adult Children, Blog, Enabling, The Blessing of Boundaries Tagged With: , ,

What the New! SANITY Support Blog is All About

January 14, 2012 By 4 Comments

SettingBoundariesBooks.com

What the SANITY Support Blog is All About

As the author of the Setting Boundaries ™ book series, a day seldom goes by when I don’t hear from someone who has read one of my books or has heard me interviewed on a radio talk show or television program.

 Folks contact me for several reasons:

  • To share their Setting Boundaries success stories
  • To learn more about the 6-Steps to SANITY, or about setting boundaries in general
  • To ask my advice in dealing with their challenging adult children, difficult people, or toxic parents
  • To inquire about starting a SANITY Support group in their home, church, or community
  • To find out where they can get my books
  • Because someone referred them to my books, website, or blog
  • To cry out for help in desperate situations concerning their adult sons, daughters, and/or grandchildren

Why have you stopped by today?

It’s exciting to hear from readers who have found SANITY and are experiencing life-changing transformation in their relationships. On the other hand, it’s often heart breaking to hear from so many people who have reached the end of their rope and are crying out for help—especially concerning relationships with their adult children.

I want to hug each one of you and let you know that you’re not alone.

  • If you are searching for hope and healing today, my prayer is that you will find it when you find SANITY Support, and that you’ll allow me and our growing blogging community to help on your journey.
  • If you know someone who desperately needs to set healthy boundaries and are looking for resources to share with them, God bless you for caring.

Who will find the SANITY Support blog helpful?

1. Parents and Grandparents who have challenging relationships w/ adult children

2. Adult children who have challenging relationships w/ toxic parents

3. Anyone who has challenging relationships with difficult people

4. Men and women readers who desire to set healthy boundaries and live a more sane life

5. Anyone living with the insanity of drama, chaos, crisis, and stress because of the poor choices someone else is making (i.e. drugs, alcohol, unemployment, crime, etc.)

6. People who have weight issues and need to set boundaries w/ food

7. Anyone who has had or is considering WLS (weight loss surgery)

8. Stressed out people looking for hope, healing and SANITY

God will always make a way when there seems to be no way, and it’s no accident you are reading this now. Stay strong, faithful and focused as you travel the journey to set healthy boundaries and find SANITY in your life.

You’ll often hear me say that the choices we make can change the story of our life.

Some of the boundary setting choices we face will be life changing. Yet it’s not just about the monumental choices we make that dramatically change the course of our life, but the individual choices we make in the everyday moments of life as well. Combined they make us who we are, a rich tapestry of experience woven together with choice.

Thank you for making the choice to visit my blog and I hope you’ll make the choice to return and participate in our community by sharing your thoughts, feelings, opinions, and insight via the comment sections after each posting. Please subscribe to the RSS blog feed on the right side of your screen, and feel free to share this link with friends and family.

What primary issues will the SANITY Support blog address?

The enabling of adult children is an epidemic issue in our society. Parents and grandparents around the country are dealing with situations that range from adult kids who simply cannot “launch,” to adult kids who are addicted to drugs and/or alcohol, have been in and out of rehabilitation centers, jail, and/or prison, and whose lives create an ongoing source of drama, chaos and crisis for the entire family.

Typically, these parents and grandparents have reached the end of their rope emotionally, financially, and spiritually, and are in desperate need of “sanity” in an “insane situation.” They are looking for guidance and reassurance to make choices that will change their lives (and hopefully the lives of their loved ones).

However, it’s not just about setting boundaries with adult children. More and more people are finding increasing challenges in their relationships with “Difficult People.” This could be a spouse or ex-spouse, siblings or other relatives, in-laws, neighbors, bosses and co-workers, church members, and the list goes on.

Setting boundaries and finding SANITY is quite literally for everyone who wants healthier and happier relationships.

Once again, welcome to the SANITY Support blog, I look forward to communicating with you as we strive to set healthy boundaries in all of our relationships and bring glory and honor to God.

Blessings and God’s peace,

 

 

 

 

 

Filed Under: Adult Children, Blog, Difficult People, Enabling, Food/Weight, Hope and SANITY from Allison Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Set Boundaries and Lose Weight with SANITY Support!

January 11, 2012 By 2 Comments

Guest VIP Blogger,

Bev Eden

Setting Boundaries with Food, WLS News and SANITY Support

Welcome to the brand new SANITY Support blog! As someone who has lost 120 pounds (and kept it off for ten years) I’m especially excited about Weight Watching Wednesday! I’m even more excited that I get to introduce you to a very special woman.

At 50-years-young, Beverly Eden has lots going on in her life, but there are three things she keeps prioritized at the top of her list. First and foremost is her relationship with God. She is a Christian who loves the Lord with all her might. Secondly, she is married to the love of her life, Paddy. Thirdly, she is a mother of five and grandmother of 10 and counting! Beverly has been working for the same school district as an office manager/secretary for 27 years. She has struggled with her weight all of her adult life. In fact, she has lost and found the same 100 pounds (or more) three different times before deciding to have weight loss surgery. In January of 2010, Bev had Roux-en-Y gastric bypass surgery, and to date, she has lost 150 pounds. Beverly is passionate about exercising for the first time in her life and watching her diet, and she wants to share her journey and encourage you to share yours.

Bev will be hosting Weight Watching Wednesday here on the SANITY Support blog, responding to your comments and posting relevant topics weekly. Way to go, Bev! (Can we get a collective yahoo?!) Make sure to subscribe to the RSS feed for this blog so you can read her Wednesday posts.)

Without further ado…may I introduce you to the wonderful, fun, fabulous, and FIT, Beverly Eden!

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Greetings to all on the first official posting on SANITY Support’s Weight Watching Wednesday!

I have always believed that everything happens for a reason. I know that sounds like just another cliché’, but it’s one about which I feel very passionately. I also believe that God allows us to go through trials in our lives to not only mold and teach us, but for us to be able to help one another.

Many people think of support as something you get. It is also something that you give. I have never had cancer and I pray that I never will. I can sympathize with people who are going through it, but I don’t know exactly how they feel. I do; however; know what it is like to struggle with weight problems and all of the issues that go with it. Having lost 150 pounds after weight loss surgery (WLS), I can offer support to people who struggle with those same issues.

Allison Bottke Plus Size Model Levi

Allison has also had weight loss surgery; she’s lost 120 pounds (check out her before and after photos! And, did any of you know Allison was one of the first plus-size models with the Wilhelmina Agency in the early 80‘s? I remember seeing her Levi Strauss ad and the Pendleton Knitwear ad as well!)

But it’s important to know that here on the SANITY Support blog, Weight Watching Wednesday is NOT only for those who have had or are considering WLS. Please join our blogging community if you want to find SANITY in the insane situations that often characterize the lives of people who struggle with any kind of weight-related issues, not just WLS issues. We’ll discuss yo-yo dieting, the fast food habit, emotional eating, fad diets, and a host of issues.

In Allison’s Setting Boundaries book series, the Six-Step SANITY acronym is a key component. The “A“ stands for, ASSEMBLE a Support Group. Studies show that next to journaling, a strong support group is the key to achieving and maintaining sustained weight loss. One way that I choose to give back to the WLS community is by blogging here and talking to everyone I meet about the benefits of losing weight.  Another way I both give and receive help is by being a part of support groups. Having others who totally understand what I am going through makes my journey so much easier! I believe that reading and discussing good books pertaining to my life’s situations are also wonderful ways of coping.

The newest book in Allison’s popular series from Harvest House Publishing is Setting Boundaries with Difficult People, and there’s no doubt in my mind that many of us who struggle with weight-related issues have more than a few difficult people in our lives (including ourselves at times!) I’d love to start a discussion group here about this new book.

(Although it’s not mandatory that you read the newest Setting Boundaries book to participate in our online community, I’d like to encourage you to pick up a copy, it could change your life!)

Hope, healing, and freedom is possible when we follow the Six-Steps to SANITY in our everyday journey through life! Let’s take that journey together here, what do you say?

Allison is just completing the fourth book in the Setting Boundaries series and I can’t wait to get my hands on it! Setting Boundaries with Food will release next year (2012) but I’ve got exciting news to share…here on Weight Watching Wednesday we’ll be getting sneak peeks at the manuscript over the next several months! Plus, we’ll be able to participate in some pre-publishing aspects AND get early access to the book before the public.

But that’s not all…we’re going to have opportunities to win free copies of Setting Boundaries with Food AND copies of the first three books in the series; Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children, Setting Boundaries with Aging Parents and Setting Boundaries with Difficult People, as well as copies of Allison’s contemporary fiction for Boomer Babes!

AND….DRUM ROLL PLEASE… for those who live in the DFW area (or wish to travel here) Allison will be hosting a special invitation-only book release party next year SPECIFICALLY FOR THE WEIGHT WATCHING WEDNESDAY COMMUNITY! We’re going to have a blast and you won’t want to miss it. (I’ve already told Allison she’s going to need a really big room to hold all of us because we’re going to have a whole lot of folks communicating in our community!)

And that’s not all…throughout the year we’ll be announcing other times when we can all get together for last-minute impromptu lunches, afternoon tea parties, or day-trip excursions with Allison. We’re going to rock this Wednesday party!

All that said, I’m excited and blessed to have the opportunity to be the official Weight Watching Wednesday Blog Hostess on the new SANITY Support blog! (Hey Allison, do I get a tiara?)

Between you and me folks, what do you say we show the other day-of-the-week blog hosts what it means to build an online community and get the comments started!

If you’ve read any of Allison’s books, please share your thoughts and feelings on the Six-Steps to SANITY. Perhaps you could visit some of the pages on the new SettingBoundariesBooks.com website, read other posts on the SANITY Support blog, and maybe watch a few of the You Tube video clips posted and share your thought.

What are some of the ways that you have found hope and healing by applying the “A” step in your life? Would you be willing to open up to others to share your experiences? And last but not least, do your relationships with difficult people affect your relationship with food? Let’s discuss relationships in general, the first chapters in Setting Boundaries with Difficult People, and how this can apply to our struggles with food and weight. Please let me know your thoughts.

Oh! There’s one more thing I want to quickly mention before I sign off. There’s an amazing online resource for anyone who has had WLS or is considering WLS, it’s called ObesityHelp.com. With an online community of thousands, this website has more information than you can shake a stick at, including a glossy hard cover magazine.

I encourage you to check out this informative website, including the two featured cover stories Obesity Help Magazine has done on Allison over the past decade.

Until the comments start flowing and we get to chatting…God bless!

Beverly

Filed Under: Blog, Food/Weight, Hope and SANITY from Allison, VIP Guest Blogs, WLS Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

SANITY Support Blog Launched – Welcome from Author Allison Bottke

January 6, 2012 By 9 Comments

Welcome to the NEW Setting Boundaries Books Website and the SANITY Support Blog

Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children and finding SANITY Support

Welcome to the first “official” post on the new SANITY Support blog!

After a great deal of prayer and planning, I’m excited to announce the launch of the brand new Setting Boundaries Books website and blog, designed to communicate with readers and help spread the message of SANITY. In addition to sharing my perspective on boundaries, I’ll be posting a lot of content directly from the hundreds of email letters I’ve received, and I hope you’ll join me in sharing your thoughts, feelings, insight, and opinions about this hot-button topic of setting boundaries. We’ll build our SANITY Support community via the comment section at the end of every post.

You can subscribe to the RSS feed for my blog at the right side of this page so you won’t miss a thing!

Many of you know that it’s been a season of changes and challenges in my life these past few years. I’m not going to belabor you with all the details of my journey since I moved to Texas from Minnesota back in August of 2007, but suffice it to say that life today is nothing like I expected it to be. But hey, whose life hasn’t been changing and challenging? It seems virtually everyone I know has been going through some type of significant trial or tribulation, can you relate? Does it seem that way to you as well?

Issues concerning the economy, jobs, and financial security (or insecurity in many instances) abound. Our relationships are being tested tremendously, and in many cases our emotional, physical, financial, and spiritual health has been compromised.

And then there’s the growing concern about our adult children…and grandchildren…or about other difficult people in our lives. It seems everywhere we turn we are being faced with boundary-setting choices.

Join me in making 2012 the year that SANITY makes a comeback in our lives!

 

Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children and finding SANITY Support

Allison and Chris on Christmas Day, 2011 at church!

The photo above was taken two weeks ago on Christmas Day when my son and I attended church together. Many of you have read about Chris in the first book in the Setting Boundaries™ series, Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children-Six Steps to Hope and Healing for Struggling Parents, a book that was born from years of painful valley experiences. This past year I’ve seen Chris continue to stay drug-free, complete his 18-month parole, and move into his own apartment this past October. Setting healthy boundaries with our adult kids does not mean we give up on them! It means we change the way we respond to their choices. It means we find SANITY and take back our own lives. It means we learn to love our adult children with open arms.

I’m excited to see what God is going to do as we begin to build a community of readers who will support, encourage, and empower one another on the journey to set healthy boundaries and find SANITY!

Thousands of people around the world have embraced the Six Steps to SANITY. You can read some of their true story testimonials here.

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Books by Allison Bottke

If you’ve read any of the books I’ve written in the Setting Boundaries ™ series from Harvest House Publishers over the past several years, you already know quite a bit about me. Even more so if we go back to the days I was writing and editing books in my God Allows U-Turns anthology. However, if this is our first meeting you can read more about me and the books I’ve written by clicking on my photo below, there’s also a You Tube video clip from my interview on the 700 Club that encapsulates my testimony.

But reading about me isn’t About Allison Bottkewhat this new blog is all about.

SANITY is Making a Comeback!

The issue of setting healthy boundaries touches every one of us every single day of our lives.

We all struggle at one time or another with challenging relationships that have weak or non-existent boundaries at their roots, and we can all use the Six Steps to SANITY to find hope, healing, and freedom in any of those relationships.

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SANITY is possible, and I want to help you find it!

I just finished writing the 4th book in the series; Setting Boundaries with Food, talk about a challenging relationship! Who doesn’t struggle with what to eat, when to eat, how much to eat, and why the heck are we eating again?

Setting Boundaries with Food will release this summer, and we’ll be talking more about this topic and about weight every Wednesday here on the SANITY Support blog. Make sure to check out the mind-boggling before and after photos of Beverly Eden our VIP guest blogger! My before and after photos are also online, did you know that I lost 120 pounds?

JOIN ME IN FORT WORTH ON SATURDAY, JANUARY 28!

If you’re in the DFW area of Texas we’ll be starting three SANITY Support groups in February! Come say hello to me in Fort Worth at a FREE informational meeting on Saturday, January 28!

In closing, what is your setting boundaries story? I’d love to hear what you think and feel about this topic, and what you’d like to see on the SANITY Support blog. Please introduce yourself and share your opinions and insight in the comment section below.

God bless and keep you,

Allison

 

Filed Under: Adult Children, Blog, Difficult People, Food/Weight, Hope and SANITY from Allison Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,